NOW THAT YOUR CHILD IS HERE. PART 1

Having a baby introduces you to a level of love that you would never have imagined however, having one who would depend on you for a lot of things doesn't feel like love or well it does but in a completely different way.

Having one with special needs means there is sometimes pain, hurt, guilt and moods that are deflated. It is hard for you as a parent as much as it is hard for the child who doesn't want to be cared for at a certain age but have no choice.

The moment you realize that your child is different, you become different yourself. You see yourself pretending for weeks, months and even years that every thing is 'normal'. It can be a lonely place to be as a parent. You can't get your head around it sometimes because you know that something is wrong.

Friends and family will always try to tell you that everything will be alright and that every child is different and so is their developmental abilities. These words are not so comforting so you cry, you ask why me and you go on to mourn your baby not because you've lost your child. 

EXCERPT FROM MY INTERVIEW WITH PUNCH NEWSPAPER.

It has taken me this long to post this here because I am still in awe. I am in awe because I never thought that a national daily ... like a popular widely read Nigerian national news paper would call me for an interview. Jesus did it. That is all I can say. 

My interview was published on the 10th of February 2018. This is the best valentines day gift is could ever ask for. 

If you are pursuing a course that is dear to your heart, don't stop. Sometimes, it may look like you are not making progress or not getting the recognition you feel you deserve, please don't stop. Keep doing what you are doing because someone somewhere is watching. Someone is learning, is being impacted and being blessed by your work. 

You may not know it but if you keep at it, one day you will smile. Your story will be told and the universe will thank you for not giving up. 

Below is the interview: 

Sharon Ifeoma is a Port Harcourt, Rivers State-based corporate trainer. Despite being afflicted by polio as a child, her drive to be a star has not slowed down. In this interview with Eric Dumo, she shares her life’s journey and things that motivate her

At what point in your life did you encounter polio?

According to my parents, I was only 10 months old when I was struck with polio. I had already started walking before it happened. It was not as if I was born with the condition.

What were some of the difficulties you faced at that stage of your life?

I can’t really tell because I was quite young then. I’m sure there were challenges but to be honest, I can’t really remember much of the happenings back then. It’s a long time ago.

How did the other children relate with you as a result of your disability? 

I WOKE UP A LONG TIME AGO

It was my first year of university and I had just been allocated to a bed space in a room up stairs in hostel B2, room 24. At that time, priority was never given to person's living with any form of disability hence, you have to figure out things for yourself if you live with disability. 

I didn't have a problem with my room position or so I thought because I was already trained and equipped to live an independent life. In my hostel, water doesn't run upstairs, the tap downstairs were the only ones functioning therefore, If I needed water to wash, bathe or cook with, I had to go downstairs to fetch some for myself.  

One Saturday, it was my room's turn to wash the bathroom. I woke up very early to do some personal washing and clean up. When I finished, my roommates were still sleeping. So I went ahead to wash the bathroom and toilet, had my shower and filled my buckets and jerrycans with water. 

I was on the last leg when my new roommate Adeline saw me and with a shocking look, the following conversation followed:

Adeline: When did you wake up? who filled all these buckets? why did't you call me, Pepe, Joy or Elohor to help you?

Me: Errr all this question for me? I do this things myself naa ( Adeline just moved into our room the night before) you are new so don't worry about me okay? IF I do need your help, I'll ask you. And by the way, I've also washed the bathroom and toilet, it's our turn today.

Adeline: What? you did that too? you strong oo
Adeline wasn't used to seeing my type and who can blame her? It wasn't normal to her hence her desire to help.

I'll try to answer Adeline's first question "When did you wake up?"

PEACE! FIND YOUR OWN PEACE.

In our quest to be seen, noticed and known in a world that seem to be moving in speed light, we lose our peace. In pursuit of happiness, validation and peace of mind, we end up lowering our values.

Can I just tell you that the peace you seek is within you? Always has been. Always will be. 

Stop faking happiness because real happiness can be recognized and felt even from afar. Don't be caught up 'trying to look happy', it will only stop you from actually forgetting to be being happy. 

Stop dancing around other peoples idea's of happiness. Some of those type of happiness was created so you can project them into your life and use them as standards. Is this not why you lose your peace?

They sold you this lie to make you feel 'inadequate', not 'well enough', 'invalid',..... 

Can I just say you are 'well enough?' as a matter of fact, you my darling are 'enough'.

Stop having a headache over noting and find your own PEACE!.

It's a new month guys. Go out and be. 

Love, light & peace.  

AWFUL BEAUTIFUL RE-ACTIONS

It was a beautiful sunny Sunday afternoon I had just finished from church but needed to drink something to quench my thirst. I walked into a restaurant close by and ordered a glass of Chapman. Seated and sipping on my drink while going through my phone smiling sheepishly at the photos on Facebook, I heard someone say hello beautiful.  

I quickly raised my head to see who it was and before I could say jack, he grabbed a chair and sat down facing me smiling. What caught my eyes was his beautiful dentition, bald head and bearded face (I'm not a fan of beards by the way) lol.

We got talking and the conversation was smooth and beautiful. We covered a  range of topics from religion to politics, education to family etc. Intelligent and well rounded guy I must say. At some point, he offered to buy me food and top up my glass but, I politely declined. Independent woman things he exclaimed and we both laughed. 

I liked him instantly but my thoughts drifted to something else.

I'm pressed and in need of the bathroom. I didn't know what to do. Should I get up or just let him leave before going to the bathroom? 

What will his re-actions be when I get up? Does he know I have a disability? Did he see when I walked into the restaurant? Will he walk away like others in disappointment?

Is this it? I hate being in this situation because I'm always at war with my thoughts. 

BEAUTIFUL REMINDER

Hey guys!!!

Happy new year!

So this year, I have decided to share more things that inspire people here and on my social media handle. I shared this on my Facebook page and thought it won't be nice to leave you guys out. So enjoy!

I don't remember not living with these babies (my legs). They are a beautiful reminder of God's faithfulness, love and grace.

This is not what every day normal looks like neither does it represent the word *perfect*.

I can't live without these babies no matter how hard I try. My doctor in the UK once recommended i undergo some procedures to enable me walk better. I said thank you sir and ran for my life biko.

This is normal to me. It is my normal.

You see, scars are uncomfortable. However, they are a beautiful reminder of where we've been, what we've been through, they show how strong and resilient we are.

Scars and imperfections drive our hunger for better. They fuel your thoughts about life good, bad and ugly. Scars are life's testaments.

INTERNATIONAL DAY OF PERSONS WITH DISABILITIES

We all know what to day is. Well if you don't know, it is a day set aside to celebrate and promote the well-being of persons living with disabilities in all spheres of life and all over the world. It is also a day to increase awareness on the challenges and struggles faced in economic, social, cultural and political sphere.

To commemorate what today is, here is a little something for you below: 

Never let ANYONE or ANYTHING define you. When I realized at age 6 that I had a disability and would live with it for the rest of my life, I was confused, I didn't understand because at home, I was a normal kid who was just like everyone else. 

People pointed my disability to me and then the bullying started pouring in. I thought I would never lead a normal life. I wondered how I was going to cope in a "perfect" world. As I grew older, I realized that just because I look different doesn't mean I can't have a good life. I decided to live a good life regardless of my looks, background or circumstances. 

I decided to be more grateful and appreciative of the things I have and the things I can do focusing less on the things I can't do.

When people say I'm strong, I smile because I know that "My strength does not come from lifting weights. My strength comes from lifting myself back up each and every time I fall"

Remember, what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger!

Selah.

#disability #disabilityawareness #myjourney #mystory #sharonifeoma #Sharinglifewithsharon #sharonspeaks #december3rd